The Standard October 26, 2024
You might have noticed beautiful wedding photographs on social media recently. Autumn has been the most popular season for U.S. weddings for almost a decade, with the majority of them taking place in October and September, followed by June and May. When the bride and groom decide to be married by a minister, pre-marital counseling is usually part of the preparation. Couples need to hear that the relationship won’t always be easy, but will take effort. Love in action, communication and self-sacrifice are required to stay in a healthy, God-centered marriage. Many counselors suggest a weekly date night for couples to prioritize the relationship.
A few days ago, our daughter said she wanted to treat us to dinner for no special reason. Last night we were to meet her at Mi Cabanita, but she would be a tad late. She confirmed when we arrived, and then my husband and I each got a text from our oldest son. He revealed that, actually, we were on a surprise date. The meal and tip total already had been paid, and we should put away our phones after learning the rules for the evening. We were to be fully present in the moment, enjoying a night of celebration and connection without conversation about work, challenges or family stress.
The following were our instructions:
- Take turns sharing favorite memories, focusing on joyful, uplifting events or moments.
- Give each other at least one genuine compliment about something that made your relationship stronger.
- Ask thoughtful questions like, “What’s one thing you’ve loved seeing me grow into over the years? What’s a little moment from our early years that still makes you smile? What do you look forward to in the next 20 years together?”
- Share what you are most grateful for about your partner today.
- Celebrate accomplishments by reflecting on the achievements you’ve reached together- big or small – and express gratefulness for your journey as a couple.
- Raise your glasses and end with a toast to your past, present and future.
Over 35 years ago, we had no idea how difficult a lifetime commitment to another person could be. Last night was a wonderful time celebrating the joys of being a team. As the Apostle Paul writes, “Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything. Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church – for we are members of his body. For this reason, a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh. This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.” Ephesians 5:21-33
